Going Gray

Memories of my grandma are filled with a woman with beautiful silver white hair. I actually don't remember seeing many pictures of my grandma without this hair. My mom tells me that it's because gray hair runs in our family, both she and my grandma were completely gray by the age of 29. As I have gotten older, I have been excited to see that I made it to and past 29 without much gray hair.

However, this summer I gave birth to my second child, and haven't slept much since then (no, he's still not sleeping through the night). And in the last 8 months, the gray hairs on my head have increased exponentially. Ella has mentioned it, my mom has mentioned it, and my hair dresser on several occasions has said, "You know, it's probably time to start thinking about what you're going to do with your gray that's coming in." (and they are not the only ones) She's given me several suggestions on what I might do. Those who know me well know two things about me: 1. I am not so much into things that take a lot of maintenance, 2. I don't like to spend money. These two things have made me more than a little hesitant about dying my hair to cover the gray.

I've spent a lot of time over the last several months thinking about what I will do with my gray hair (Ella thinks that this year, my hair is going to turn all gray and I'll look "weird"). I must admit that I cringe when I think about the thought of being in my mid-thirties and almost entirely gray. But, I have finally come to the decision that I'm going to let my hair change naturally and not dye it (which my incredible husband is in total support of).

Why you might ask? For two reasons:

1. I have a 5 year old girl at my house. She is already very concerned with what she wears, how she accessorizes and can't wait until the day she can wear make up and high heels. I hope that my choice can teach her that who we are is about more than what we look like on the outside. That we do not need to make ourselves into something that we are not, it's okay to be the way that God made us, no matter what that looks like.

2. Much of my work is with young women at Trevecca. The world makes it their business to give them all kinds messages about what they should look like, what makes them significant, and what they should do with their bodies. I can be one voice in their lives that says that whatever they may look like, it's okay.

I am probably being idealistic, it's probably not that important. But, I feel led to take this step and be a different voice in the midst of all those calling from our culture. I wonder what my all-gray head will look like. Only time will tell.

Memories and Images

I was up late with the baby last night. I was trying to convince him that he really didn't want to eat 2-3 times a night. In the interim (read - while he was crying in his crib and I watched the timer slowly click down until I could go in and comfort him) I sat in the living room, which was pretty cold.

After all was said and done (Alistair won, I was too sick and tired to go more than about an hour) I headed back up to my room to get some sleep. I laid in my bed and I was absolutely freezing, no matter what position I was in, how closely I cuddled up to Brad, I couldn't warm up. I finally went to the closet and got out a few blankets to pile on to keep me warm. As I laid in bed trying to go to sleep, a few memories came to my mind:

The first was of laying in bed in my Grandpa Gerbsch's house. It was awfully cold there in the winter at night, but grandpa had lots of (scratchy) blankets that he would pile on. So, my nose and face were a little cold as I drifted off to sleep, but there was a heavy pile of blankets on top to keep me warm.

The second was yet another from my grandparents, this time Grandma and Grandpa Lipa. I was often sick as a child and had a really nasty sounding cough (my mom says that I bark like a seal). When I would spend the night with my grandparents, my grandpa would give me a shot of Nyquil (the green kind), slather Vicks on my chest, and send me to his very warm and cozy bed with blankets piled on top. I would settle down and quickly fall asleep, waking in the morning feeling much better.

These aren't big memories, but these grandparents have been gone for over a decade, my Grandpa Lipa almost 20 years. I will often get a fleeting thought of them, but I am thankful for moments (even freezing ones in the middle of the night) that bring back to me vivid pictures of the grandparents that I love so much, reminders of the people that they were, and the way that they loved and cared for me.

I miss you Grandma and Grandpa Lipa and Grandpa Gerbsch!

Life Really Does Go on!

It's hard to believe that it's been since January that I've posted. Certainly much has changed in life with the arrival of Alistair Joseph in June. Since I'm waiting for him to fall back asleep in hopes of weaning him off of one of his two nighttime feedings, what a better time to post!

Ella turns five on Monday. It's hard to believe that we have had her in our lives for that long. She is such a blessing. Daily, she is a reminder to us of the goodness of God, the beauty and laughter of children, and the ways in which our children can delight us with even the small things that they do. I appreciate her sense of humor, her amazing intelligence, and her kindness and generosity towards others.

Alistair is just over 5 months old, and is one of the happiest babies I have ever seen. When he makes eye contact with you, his face lights up in an amazing smile that will melt your heart. He is a stubborn boy (I say he gets it from his daddy), and likes to get his own way. And, he's certainly making life interesting. Over the past few weeks, he's started eating real food and loves avocados and sweet potatoes. He's turned over a few times, but working on doing it more. I can't to hear his first word and get a sense of his little voice. What joy he brings to our lives.

And, they love each other! The joy that I see in their eyes as Ella goes in to greet Alistair in the morning, or reaches down to show him a new toy, or holds him in her arms is awe inspiring. We couldn't be more blessed than to have these two wonderful children as a part of our lives. We look forward to watching them grow and become the people that God is calling them to be in our world.

Dexter is a boy!

I had my 20 week ultrasound yesterday, and we got the wonderful news that Dexter is a boy. Big sister, Ella, who really, really, really wanted a sister is in a state of shell shock, but says, "I'll love the baby anyway, and give him lots of kisses." It's fun to know, and we look forward to meeting him in early June. And, in case you were wondering, no, Dexter will not be his name :)

Presidential Scholar?

On our drive to the Midwest for Christmas, we somehow got onto the topic of presidents, and who was president when. On a stop at a local K-Mart (we were early for a dinner date in Upland, IN, not much choice around) we found a place mat with all of the presidents and when Ella asked us to buy it, we decided that a parent couldn't go wrong. What we were not prepared for what would happen after we actually started using the place mat. Each meal is now filled with questions about the presidents: who was good (Abe Lincoln was the best, we tell her), who was bad (I'm not even going to post our opinions about that!), how long were they president (She finds it fascinating that Grover Cleveland has two pictures because he served in non-consecutive terms), who is alive and who is dead? She now has favorites which include: Andrew Jackson (who let all kinds of people into the White house and they got mud on the chairs), William Henry Harrison (who had the shortest presidency, dying after he refused to wear a coat or hat during a freezing inauguration, giving the longest inauguration speech in history) and William Howard Taft (who was so large he got stuck in a bathtub). We didn't think that she would enjoy it so much! Unfortunately, Brad and I are running out of presidential trivia to share with her. Do you have any good trivia on presidents that we can share?

An Advent Prayer

Pray with longing for a better world and the arrival of the Kingdom of God.

In our secret yearnings
we wait for your coming,
and in our grinding despair
we doubt that you will.

And in this privileged place
we are surrounded by witnesses who yearn more than do we
and by those who despair more deeply than do we.

Look upon your church and its pastors
in this season of hope
which runs so quickly to fatigue
and in this season of yearning
which becomes so easily quarrelsome.

Give us the grace and the impatience
to wait for your coming to the bottom of our toes,
to the edges of our fingertips.

We do not want our several worlds to end.

Come in your power
and come in your weakness
in any case
and make all things new.

Amen.

Walter Brueggeman
Awed to Heaven, Rooted in Earth: Prayers of Walter Brueggemann

An Addition to the Family

We just wanted to let everyone know that we are expecting a new addition to the Daugherty family! I am 14 weeks pregnant, and Baby Daugherty (whom we affectionately call Dexter, and no, we don't know if the baby is a boy!)will arrive sometime in early June. We are all excited about the new addition to our family, particularly Ella who told us a few weeks before we let her know, "Mommy, I think I'm ready to be a big sister now!".

We'll keep you updated as the time draws closer!